author’s note: writing 2.8 again

this is a snapshot of what i’m working on at this moment.  i have taken 2.8, moved some of it to 2.7, then took what i was trying to write of 2.9 and mixed it all up.  then, yesterday, i changed it around again, putting the same material in different orders and trying to write an overlying metalevel of fiction over it.  stiff and stilted, but it’s a start, and i can totally rewrite it again at the chapter stage.  so here is the  section i’m working on now.  you don’t have to read it or anything, it’s just a snapshot, and it’s actually more outline than it is daily writing (quotes in italics).  after posting it, i will go back to my document and start trying to write it into a section.  mazeltov.


Portia remembered the angel’s main point, that bit at the end where he did all the talking and they just drifted thru space and listened to him. “I know it sounds crazy, but we’re supposed to make this videogame version of what happened to us, and use it to teach superpowers. That’s our mission.” She paused. “Actually, it sounds kind of stupid.”

I want to learn superpowers, people thought.

“But that’s not realistic,” someone objected. “We’re not superheros, we’re just ordinary humans with stupid day jobs.”

“But we can BE superheros,” Portia insisted, and people thought Way.


teach the essence.

“There were magic numbers,” Portia remembered, doodling pointed stars. “There were a lot of threes, and sevens. The angel showed us a grid. It was like a puzzle, only it changed…” She looked up at Josh. “It was a teaching device.” Her face lit up as she remembered. “The essence.” She flipped the page and drew a grid of boxes, then bent to label each one.

He nodded. “We’re supposed to teach the essence.” He thought back to the angel’s tiresome lectures, la la la I can’t hear you. “That’s why the grid bullshit,” he said to the crowd. “It’s complicated.” “But not really,” Portia said. “It’s really very easy. It just changes…” She stopped. There are no words. The people stared at them, waiting. Some were getting impatient.

The boy and girl shared the image of a large round sort of blob, with widely-spaced points that were connected by lines, the lines making planes, the planes making levels. The points were data, they explained, and the lines were time, and the planes were space, and you could move around it any way you liked, and get a different outcome each time.

Yes it’s complicated, they agreed. But then it resolved itself smaller, or they got bigger, and then it seemed simple, more like a game.

“There’s this energy field created by all living beings,” Portia started. “It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together…” People were reciting it with her. She broke off. “But that’s what the essence is,” she insisted. “That’s what we’re supposed to teach. It’s the secret of everything: we’re all connected.”

“And your point is?” someone jeered.

Josh answered. “The point is that connection to everything is how you make things happen. That’s how come we can hear each other in our heads, and how everybody was almost flying earlier. When you act like there’s no separation between us, then there isn’t. You get what you’re looking for. And it’s real.”

How’s that different from any other fantasy game? Because it worked. We flew. We made things. We can still do things even after the drugs have worn off. The problem is that the moment you try to put it into words, it starts sounding like the worst psychobabble newage twaddle. “Sorry,” he said to the newagers in the crowd. But it really is mind over matter. no, just sleight of hand, scoffed a troll. Sigh.

we’re all connected.

we’re all one, that’s quantum entanglement, said a Science Track guy. that’s a full mystical experience, agreed a psylicibin enthusiast and zen practitioner on the Silk Road Track. Midi-chlorians. symbiont cells in touch with the force, and various Star Wars factions broke off into a doctrinal debate about it. quantum tunneling at synapses. You can really make a ki ball, someone pointed out. Or a thoughtform. There’s the Force Trainer. In stores now. Subliminal instruction and binaural beats. you can teach that. but it’s not anything you can pick up overnight. that’s why it’s got to be immersive. people have to practice the lessons, to do them over and over and develop the psychic muscles (?) they need. learn how to think quantum. need to learn to inhabit a universe where action at a distance, tunneling, and time travel are facts of life, where everybody’s psychic, everybody’s a superhero.

quantum paradigm change into world of possibilities and probabilities. time travel, teleportation, everyone psychic.

why quantum?

why call it quantum? why not pick one – jedi training / whatever, make something up? because quantum is the next paradigm change. because it’s happening now, we’re all realizing that reality isn’t solid and invarying. xcept for fundamentalists. but they’re neolithic. quantum is nano and techno and spiritual and scifi. there’s no such thing as an objective and independent universe. there’s not a physical universe out there, it’s all internal, and it all depends on the observer. the old way, the classical physics way, says that it’s possible, with enough measurement, to figure everything out. that leads to one right answer, good versus bad, us versus them, my way or the highway. the quantum way says not only is it all relative, but the possibilities are endless. it doesn’t even exist until you observe it. and what you observe depends on what you’re looking for.

evidence quantum processes occur on macro level, that connectedness is a real thing, every action has consequences. yeah but they’re just [name].

the coming paradigm change, plus it’s all about connection and magical things like teleportation and psychic powers. but that’s misuse of quantum which is very small, made of math, and not you create your own universe.

can’t have quantum effects on macro level. dogmatism already. anger by some at pretending it’s possible – raising hopes, manipulating gullible. reject multiple worlds. pseudoscientific misuse of quantum to include consciousness and thus hippy drug stuff.

but you do. […] then why the mess, why no world peace?

Does the you-create-your-own-reality principle apply only to benign, politically correct intentions like world peace—which shows no signs of happening, despite all sorts of individual and mass prayers and intentions?  Wouldn’t the principle apply with equal validity to malevolent individuals?  Suppose my intention is to bring a black hole into the solar system or to abuse and manipulate someone else’s reality? 

what’s all this crap about quantum? it’s only quantum at very small levels, and doesn’t apply to us like that. we follow the laws of good old newton – gravity, time, the speed of light. plus, the language of quantum mechanics is math, not english, and when you try to translate it you run the risk of going narcissistic and thinking you could be God. Uncertainty doesn’t mean you can sprinkle fairy dust and your wishes will come true. This isn’t My Little Pony.

but you do create your own reality – […]

so how come so many bad things happen? why is there cancer? pollution? poverty? who in their right minds would create the kind of political division we’re living with?

what about those who want it that way, who want to cause misery, who want to have it all for themselves? the dark side is winning but the plucky good side is on the move. that’s always how it is. so, in this case we’ve just been handed a whole toolbox full of good side weapons. which are? faith hope and charity. no. knowing everything’s connected and sharing everything and passing the good along, because wanting it all and denying it to others and hating anybody who’s not like you is bad, because it’s from fear. heirarchy is bad. authority is bad. anarchy is how the game is played, consensus.

you lost me there. i’m for romney.

basically put, things from love are good, and things from fear are bad. connectedness is good, shared consciousness is good – everybody agrees. and when everybody agrees, then we can change the reality we all share. and these tools let you work with the connections. it’s still just a figment. there’s something to be said about the placebo effect. but there are lots of people who throw their crutches away, but nobody has ever grown a new leg and tossed the prosthesis. brain, synapse. our minds interfere with everything that hapens whether we’re conscious of it or not. so? knowledge in experimenter’s mind causes wave function to collapse. uncertaintly is built into the fabric of reality – we see only what we’re looking for. conscious field, generated together, focused on and guided deliberately with intent. resonant wave, field of attraction. conscious, most fields unconscious, unfocused. tulpas levitation. everything you thought was true is a lie. global awakening.

end product of dying classical system.  that’s the consequences of a classical worldview – one right way authoritarianism. if we understand and take responsibility for what we’re creating then it’ll all be better.

bullshit, because it only works on small scale, not fairy dust. gullible wish fulfilling bronies.

but observer choice function collapse, basis of reality is uncertainty. making a game as if quantum paradigm was already our reality and classical physics is only a special case. intent. conscious fields. widespread belief in magic like cellphones from star trek communicators (dick tracy/jules verne) makes it all possible – collapse wave function.

stop right there. because light is a wave or particle because of the observer’s expectations does not mean that you create your own universe. can’t mix new age narcissism with submolecular science.

but macro quantum effects. conscious fields.

nobody growing new leg, no world peace.

angel said train them and it will come.


why teach the 3×7 if the real message is we’re all one? in a quantum world. so we need to act like it. and like our generation grown up on the internet, we conceive of the world differently than old people, and so different things are possible for us that weren’t for them. like before pcs and cellphones it was xeroxes and faxes. stone knives and bearskins. so if we make a game where you have to immerse yourself in a quantum world, then people will get used to it, and pretty soon they’ll be using the same techniques at home, school, and the office. the whole world will change. after years of i dream of jeannie and bewitched and my favorite martian, a whole generation eagerly accepted the idea of the force.

what about the ethics? changing peoples’ worldviews when they’re not ready? arjuna must fight evil; they’re already dead.

“But how are you going to teach that?” “How many people grew up believing in Star Trek?” Hands went up. “How about I Dream of Jeanne?” More hands. “My Favorite Martian? Bewitched?” Lots of hands. “Star Wars.” Everybody’s hand in the air, some waving. We’ve grown up knowing in our hearts that all the tales of aliens and space travelers is true. If we believe strongly enough, we can make it happen. “Tinker Bell kicks ass!” If we could make a game where people go around acting like it’s true, and practice while they play, and want to live that way,



real, can teach

pass thru touch

why discipline

but you pass it by touch. by energy. transference. infection. by intent. and receptivity. then why the discipline? to make it second nature. and the philosophy is to give it a structure and rules.

Portia summed it up. “Most all the methods teach concentration, breathing, meditation, physical exercises. They all develop imagination and willpower. Lots of academics – language, culture, history, philosophy, math, science, medicine, herbs. But self-mastery is the basis.” Some weren’t happy with this. “Are you saying they all boil down to self-discipline? Like an army of superheros all marching in lockstep?” The boy answered. “It takes a lot of maturity to learn these things. They’re very dangerous. Everybody has lots of bad habits, and it can get pretty ugly. I should know.” “Mainly the reason for discipline is so you don’t abuse your powers,” someone said. “That’s why they’re called secret teachings. Not everyone should know this stuff.” “The angel said to teach it to everybody, I’m pretty sure. Didn’t he?” Portia turned to Josh. “Yeah,” he said, suddenly remembering another lecture. “He was pretty insistent about it. The important thing was to touch as many people as possible. We were tossing games into the crowd like it was raining.” “We should charge for it and weed out the unworthy,” said one, and another retorted, “Then you’d just get the psychopaths.” He said weed, the boy snickered. “Don’t forget the chemical pathways to higher brain function. Substances can put you there and teach you how to be. The whole training part is learning how to get back there on your own.” “And there are the altered states you can reach thru sex,” said Fairy from the door, coming in and looking appreciatively at the packed room. “These are all valid ways, and there are loads more, because they all have to do with being conscious.”

“Waking up,” said someone in the crowd. Becoming enlightened, others added. Being one with the force. Being a shamanChrist consciousness.

quantum – mind over matter, connection = power. entirely quantum, where everything manifested is created by the players, who either leave them there (the advanced ones) or pull them around in the air after their avatars.

players’ knowledge of quantum physics is developed by the graduated exercises they were shown in their vision, starting with a review of classical and relativistic physics. the exercises are designed to produce quantum effects in the game that must be learned and practiced by the player, and knowledge is tested before the player moves to the next level. must be educational progression, some practical basis of understanding in order to pass the essence on. it’s not just feeling, there are theories and it’s a real learning curve.



so if we teach the magic…but you can’t learn magic without discipline…

are we just talking about brainwaves here?  is deep meditation equivalent to whatever waves on the eeg?  alpha and theta.  if you induce these waves, do you lapse into these states?

It seems to be triggered via some flow thru some proximity field mechanism. But then you have to learn how to use it, and all the background materials. But why science, why math? Why not just use it intuitively? I don’t know. There’s a reason, the angel told us. But I forget it. Let’s just say it’s dangerous to go using it at will without a lot of thou shalt nots in place. For everybody’s protection. So we have a community, there are all these rules to learn, and initiates need it turned on for them. Sounds like your garden variety secret society to me. handshakes? secret codes? special underwear? “”we could ask why should methods for awakening consciousness be kept a ‘mystery?’  one reasonable explanation put forth is that a person needed to have reached a certain level of responsible maturity and spiritual advancement to learn about such things because when the higher states are reached, (as we have pointed out,) it is said one acquires the use of certain ‘powers’ of creation and the holders of the knowledge wanted to make sure people used the knowledge wisely.  now we can consider that we’re in an era when such ideas can be discarded simply as old ways of thinking.  if we continue to lock in place the idea that enlightened minds or awakened thinking is only for a special few ‘spiritual elite’ how can we ever expect to live the wisdom?”

everyone. train them all and let the force sort them out.

really just consciousness expansion.

ramana explained to those who inquired that it is the mind that is vast, not the world.  the knower is ever greater than the known, and the seer is greater than the seen.  that which is known is contained within the knower, and that which is seen is in the seer; the vast expanse of the sky is in the mind, not outside, because the mind is everywhere and there is no outside to it. “here is the essential key that opens the lock to time travel:  find ways to suspend your bodily awareness.  this can be accomplished in two paradoxically different ways.  one way is to do as maharshi did – contemplate your essential self by holding one thought in your mind, ‘i am not the body.’  the second way involves practicing mindfully what patanjali calls asanas, the physical poses and reposes used to bring the mind to concentration and absorption.  as iyengar explains, this often involves perfecting the asanas, going beyond the trials of learning the poses to discover both the power and the limitations of the finite body. that is, by becoming fully conscious of the body, the practitioner realizes that he or she is other than the body and merges with the soul.”

real message is about raising consciousness. hippie.

an unconscious person is dogmatic and judgmental, believes ads and news reports, thinks what everybody knows must be true, gets caught up in their emotions (panic about the overwhelming urgency of my needs in this moment), is conservative and fearful and stupid. a conscious person avoids histrionics and strong emotions because they cloud the mind, sees the twist involved in understanding the background truth, the boy and girl are more conscious now; calmer and more insightful, more rational. but in a quantum way, because we’re not talking about regular newtonian rationality.

bullshit effect just oxy starvation. scoff.

magic is just oxygen deprivation

so called OBEs are products of dehydration and oxygen starvation and aren’t actually valid, observed a skeptic track guy. and they’ve been scripted by popular culture. just because it’s a common experience thru the ages argues for its validity, not continuing human error. sucker born every minute. eternal truth. which truth; if it’s quantum, there is no one truth, so which one is the eternal one? grrr. don’t give me beauty and lightworkers, because the dark side uses the force to control and oppress the universe, so it’s not like a quantum world is going to be happy like heaven.

Raymond Moody, an MD who has written several books on the afterlife based on patient testimonials,  who believes NDEs are evidence of  a soul (consciousness that exists separately from the brain), and evidence of the existence of an afterlife. He’s boiled the typical NDE down to a few key features. First, there’s a strange kind of noise, alternately described as a ringing or a buzzing. There is a sense of blissful peace, and often an out-of-body experience (feeling as if one is floating above one’s body and observing it from that vantage point). There’s that light at the end of the tunnel, being met by loved ones, angels, or other religious figures, and a kind of “life review” — seeing one’s life flash before one’s eyes. But as the Skeptic’s Dictionary helpfully points out, Moody’s books ignore the fact that as many as 15% of NDEs are outright hellish experiences….The results were a bit startling: about 18% reported being able to recall some portion of what happened when they were clinically dead, and between 8 and 12 percent said they experienced some form of an NDE. Neurochemistry offers some convincing alternative explanations. Perhaps NDEs aren’t evidence of an afterlife, but illusions created by a dying (oxygen deprived) brain. Cardiac arrest and the anesthesias used in ERs are capable of triggering NDE-like brain states. The Dutch researchers found that “similar experiences can be induced through electrical stimulation of the temporal lobe,” for instance, as can neurochemicals such as endorphins and serotonin, and hallucinogenic drugs like LSD and mescaline. He describes REM intrusion as “a glitch in the brain’s circuitry that, in times of extreme stress, may flip it into a mixed state of awareness where is is both in REM sleep and partially awake at the same time.” Something similar might be happening with NDEs,…..managed to induce NDEs with ketamine, a hallucinogenic related to PCP, but far less destructive; it’s an anesthetic that works not just by dulling pain, but by creating a dissociative state. According to Jansen, the conditions that give rise to NDEs — low oxygen, low blood flow, low blood sugar, and so forth — can kill brain cells, and the brain often responds by triggering a flood of chemicals very similar to ketamine to protect those cells, which would produce “out of body” sensations and possibly even hallucinations. Jansen claims his approach can reproduce all the main elements Moody attributes to NDEs: the dark tunnel with a light at the end, out of body experiences, strange noises, communing with god, and so on……neural noise. During cardiac arrest, in the throes of death, the brain is deprived of oxygen, causing brain cells to fire rapidly and quite randomly in the visual cortex. There are lots of cells firing in the middle, and fewer towards the outer edge, producing white light in the center fading into dark at the outer edges. That feeling of peace and well-being might be due to the fact that the brain is pumping out endorphins in response to pain, which can produce a dream-like state of euphoria. That same cerebral anoxia might also cause the strange buzzing or ringing sound people claim to hear when they enter an NDE.”

 girl gets mad, goes on fire, footage.

some leave thinking it’s all a scam or at best a delusion.

buzz in the line for shatner’s panel.


About jeanne

artist, grandma, alien

Posted on September 9, 2012, in Author's Note, writing fiction and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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